2middle

	#109764　　daydream reply
	HANDLE:　green.light　DATE:　2026年4月16日　0時0分
	i only like the feeling of "just being" for a short period of time. if i don't give myself any goal to focus on then i'll have to focus on my present state and i find it better to just put that aside and stare straight at the future. if i don't think about changing, my life starts feeling stagnant and meaningless and i can't bear such an existence ever since a kid, i was always raised to be very competitive and even now i don't want to fall behind anyone else, i've always wanted to be ahead and if i doubt that, ill lose sight of myself and my goals do you get what i mean?
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	#109763　　飞
	HANDLE:　freya　DATE:　2026年4月15日　23時33分
	人类不会飞翔，或许是因为心太重了。
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	#109762　　ether
	HANDLE:　Deadman　DATE:　2026年4月15日　12時2分
	i don't know what to think lately. i have been feeling numb, emotionless even. i can hear the ether calling out to me. i wish i weren't so angry all the time
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	#109761　　Re: 20260414
	HANDLE:　Daydream　DATE:　2026年4月15日　10時10分
	bitterpearl wrote: > I never decided to work on myself. I hope that can change. I find the concept of "change" so weird. A long time ago I had the thought that change was always too far and unreachable, and in that mesh of thought I decided to just "be." This thought freed me, there was no hill of hardships to climb. I could just be. If I wanted to be better, that was all there was, I was better, because it stopped mattering whether I was better right then and there, or whether I even thought I could actually do it. I stopped doubting. I could just believe that even if I wasn't what I wanted, I would always be on my way there, and that was enough. I know my experience and thoughts are probably just mine and mine alone to relate to, but I wonder what you think of it.
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	#109760　　n
	HANDLE:　kainyy　DATE:　2026年4月15日　8時7分
	eu so queria ser amada
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	#109759　　love
	HANDLE:　Raincoat　DATE:　2026年4月14日　19時58分
	Love is the most accessible 'higher' feeling, which in itself is a contradiction in terms. If it were higher than it would most surely be inaccessible to lower minds. Resolving this, I think that the intensification of these experiences is limited to a particular class of person, and that a real and defined pathos which isn't inclusive to bluestockings will tend to overpower and saturate the content of ordinary life. There is almost certainly something masochistic about this. In fact, stories which end unhappily, where the height of feeling is galvanised through not-becoming, through deep-set melancholy and bittersweetness, are far superior to me than happily-ever-afters. I see myself in the loser who dies alone, never having had a desire reciprocated.
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	#109758　　Re: Re: Re: 想像力がない
	HANDLE:　うめ　DATE:　2026年4月14日　17時46分
	うめ wrote: > 栞 wrote: > > > > 分かる、、私の解釈の範囲内での所見を述べるが、0か100の思考になりがちで、ふと困ることがある。他の打開策が浮かばないほど自分は経験も浅いのか…と、自分に絶望とまではいかない何かを覚える。 > > > レスありがとうございます。答えが出なくても、日々の出来事は進んでいく。では、その時に自分は何をするべきか？あるいは何をするべきでないか？ここで、言葉で考えたって、やらなくちゃいけないことは山積している、ということかな？
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	#109757　　Re: Re: 想像力がない
	HANDLE:　うめ　DATE:　2026年4月14日　17時28分
	栞 wrote: > > 分かる、、私の解釈の範囲内での所見を述べるが、0か100の思考になりがちで、ふと困ることがある。他の打開策が浮かばないほど自分は経験も浅いのか…と、自分に絶望とまではいかない何かを覚える。 > レスありがとうございます。答えが出れば良いのです。でも、問題は答えが出ない場合。何かを自分は突きつけられているような気がするのだけど、それに対する答えが上手く導けない時、困ってしまうのです。そういう時に、「私はこう思う」という答えを、バシッと提示出来たら、どんなに楽か。それが出来ないのが、今の自分なのだと、うすうす気づいてはいるのですが。あなたの答えで言えば、０か６５とか７５とかどっちつかずの答えが多いということかな？
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	#109756　　mina
	HANDLE:　139141　DATE:　2026年4月14日　16時31分
	today i am so exhausted. tired of everything the realization. I'm lying if I say it didn't affect me at all or it did not gave me pain I dont want to drop out plus my classmate is pitying me or what about it. I guess im strong too strong to hold my tears awhile ago in a public transportation. I badly want to cry about it. I really dont want
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	#109755　　20260414
	HANDLE:　bitterpearl　DATE:　2026年4月14日　14時44分
	I've officially been on and off this bbs for 2 years now. I miss when I had no access to social media so I would rely on this website for human connection. now, I'm out of high school, I have a job, but I'm still as miserable because I never decided to work on myself. I hope that can change.
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	#109754　　Re: Re: 生日
	HANDLE:　z　DATE:　2026年4月14日　10時42分
	米剑卡 wrote: > z wrote: > > 19歲存在的意義是為了悼念18歲的自己 > 祝你生日快樂，我也，快19歲了。但老實說，還在想著17歲的事情。預先祝你生日快樂。我認為17會是青春最美好的時候了，彷彿一切的傷痛和令人難以接受的事情都會被青春傷痛給升格美化，雖然這樣講或許有些偏頗，但對我來講大概就是這樣的。
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	#109753　　Re: 想像力がない
	HANDLE:　栞　DATE:　2026年4月14日　10時30分
	うめ wrote: > 自分は最近、想像力がないなと思っている。 > 簡単なことで良い。 > 自分の想像力を使って物事を乗り越える力というか、ある種の強引さみたいなものを、 > 持てたら、もっと世界は広がるのでは？ > 分かる、、私の解釈の範囲内での所見を述べるが、0か100の思考になりがちで、ふと困ることがある。他の打開策が浮かばないほど自分は経験も浅いのか…と、自分に絶望とまではいかない何かを覚える。
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	#109752　　nojenta
	HANDLE:　ena　DATE:　2026年4月14日　7時13分
	as pessoas se aproveitam de mim e eu permito que isso aconteça
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	#109751　　Re: 生日
	HANDLE:　米剑卡　DATE:　2026年4月14日　7時2分
	z wrote: > 19歲存在的意義是為了悼念18歲的自己祝你生日快樂，我也，快19歲了。但老實說，還在想著17歲的事情。
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	#109750　　想像力がない
	HANDLE:　うめ　DATE:　2026年4月14日　3時31分
	自分は最近、想像力がないなと思っている。簡単なことで良い。自分の想像力を使って物事を乗り越える力というか、ある種の強引さみたいなものを、持てたら、もっと世界は広がるのでは？
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	#109749　　grief
	HANDLE:　j.moonie　DATE:　2026年4月13日　22時24分
	It's a strange thing to say the least. A misconception I hear often is that it gets easier over time, but honestly, the smallest reminder of that person only puts me back to square one. Of course, others handle it better than others. I don't necessarily know how to ignore the feeling. The thought never really leaves your mind, no matter how fucked up you may get. I've been listening to songs my best friend and I would listen to on drives back home after parties. We listened to the same music, so trying to listen to anything is a constant reminder. I've done just about everything, the most I can do is just accept it, and I have a long time ago. I just miss that bastard.
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	#109748　　Ether and desire
	HANDLE:　Raincoat　DATE:　2026年4月13日　16時48分
	It's not like religious feeling, which in itself has a medley of contraceptives to sedate desire; any strong-enough feeling which might give rise to violent, inconsolable urges. To me there is an immediate hierarchy of feeling, for one I could never imagine myself ever wanting to do away with that violence entirely, even when it appeals to my lowermost nature. It has always seemed to me the case that all social arrangements, and thus all experiments of social engineering, eusociality, desire to rid itself of this element, to anaesthetize its subjects and force them into manageable, calculable mannerisms and repetitions. I've been listening to Kokyū a lot recently. It's made me extremely sentimental.
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	#109747　　騒音の間の静寂
	HANDLE:　フィリア　DATE:　2026年4月13日　8時28分
	ç≈ãﬂÅAéÑÇ™êÿñ]ÇµÇƒÇ¢ÇÈÇÃÇÕê√Ç©Ç»èÍèäÇæÇØÇ≈Ç∑ÅBëõâπÇ™ê‚Ç¶ä‘Ç»Ç≠ë±Ç≠ÇÊÇ§Ç…äÇ∂ÇƒÅAÇæÇÒÇæÇÒîÊÇÍÇƒÇ´ÇƒÇ¢Ç‹Ç∑ÅBÇΩÇæÅAè≠Çµê√Ç©Ç…ëßÇÇµÇΩÇ¢ÇæÇØÇ»ÇÒÇ≈Ç∑
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	#109746　　リリィについて
	HANDLE:　KUKU　DATE:　2026年4月13日　8時24分
	先日、リリィのファンに会えました。会えたことがなかったので心より嬉しく思っています。私たちはエーテルを受ける同志です。
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	#109745　　生日
	HANDLE:　z　DATE:　2026年4月13日　4時6分
	19歲存在的意義是為了悼念18歲的自己
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